help me. he won't leave me alone. he just licked my ear and he's so drunk. get him off me. we're in the closet. help.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
Do you think Tom Brady went home tonight and changed his facebook status to "pink with lace"?
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I'LL COME GET YOU. GOTTA FIND A SUIT THAT COVERS TIT BRUISES FIRST.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
I'd still fuck that
You'd fuck a dead moose
Quite possible
Is it a bad thing when vodka doesn't taste like vodka anymore?
We finally gave up searching because everything had started to look like flip flops
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