the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I bet the first cavemant to make fire got so much pussy
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything that you guys said happened came back to me. like a tidal wave of regret.
I wonder if they'd let me siphon the gas out my car before they impound it
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Just don't let me fall on anything that can be broken. Unless its a dick
I'm petting the cat while shitting. This is all I ever wanted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Walking my dog and eating a taco in last night's dress.. Classy
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
all i want is a guy to go down on me while i eat peanutbutter from a jar
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
Currently watching high school football on ESPN. Drink every time they say 'this kid's got potential' or 'look at this kid go' or 'atta kid' We're done for..
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
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