Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
areolas are like halos for boobs.
I'm so proud of us for fucking the same friend group before we met in a completely unrelated instance.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
Chef at hibachi place learned it was my bday and sprayed 20 second count worth of saki in my mouth. Not sure it was the right image to share with my kids, but thought you'd be proud.
The effect you have on my penis from a different state is impressive
just won 200$ from the school for "liking" the anti-alcohol seminar. putting it to good use
how?
not even kidding, my fake id is arriving in 6-8 business days
Last night did I take a piece of pizza out of your hand and then proceed to eat it?
Twice...
Ever had someone sing happy birthday to you during sex?
Got home to the hotel 3hrs ago per texts sent not in english to not a full phone number
I'll have you know my trust issues and my daddy issues are two COMPLETELY different topics of conversation.
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
DO NOT LET HIM TAKE CONTROL OVER YOUR BOWELS
Slept with a member of the band last night, found out today after extensive stalking he’s engaged. Pro tip: don’t research one night stands.
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