we were both hunting dick last night. it ended terribly for both of us.
Kenny Powers is just a normal guy with exceptional hair
We will have to stop frequently for food, stretching legs, interesting things on the side of the road, and sex. So you might as well eat.
She kept screaming "yeah! You pick up my books!" the whole time. . .
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
think they'd let him outta jail for my wedding? we could have him back by like midnight....
Those people having sex on the beach kept looking over at you guys throwing his shoes at the seagulls.
MASS TEXT: Lets start a new tradition. Black Friday log pic contest. I'm waiting.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I had a dream about a vibrator with 42 different settings. If that's not a good indication I need to get laid, I don't know what is
when you're a senior and the freshman guy you wake up next to asks who you are, you DO NOT give him your real name.
How about to stay friends we only have sex on our birthdays. Maybe national holidays too. And days we get really drunk. Wanna get really drunk?
I masterbated to his instagram page. Too far or....?
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
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