Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
If I remember who won the superbowl tomorrow morning.. I think I'm just going to quit drinking. There really won't be a point anymore
I've never felt so inclined to grow a dick. THIS is what the gays in this town have done to me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At one point, the guy you were fucking high-fived with the guy I was fucking. We should hang out with them again?
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
I'm ordering a French maid costume for my dog too. It's like a couples costume, except for losers with dogs.
You strapped the bucket of KFC into the carseat and refused to let me drive over 20 miles per hour the whole ride home. That high.
No idea but I'm preparing for 4 tequila shots and tons of vomit
in the middle of telling this chick to sober up i was shotgunning beers. im gonna be ab awsome nurse.
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