HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
WHY DID I DRINK ALL THE INGREDIENTS FOR VOMIT?!
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
We aren't going to mix hockey and sex texts tonight.
I totally agree. all sexting is on hold till after the games over.
Playoffs. This shit is serious.
His hands were made for my vagina.
Tried to eat a chip. Mouth wouldn't cooperate. Nearly died. Wow I've missed this.
I'm sorry to inform you but your friends with benefits card has expired has the beginning of the year. If you wish to renew your card you must submit a picture of a fully erect penis. Please note that not all request for a FWB card is accepted.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
I'm gonna get drunk in the shower and yell at my parents during dinner. Have fun in Texas.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
The secret to finals week is to have an orgasm for every point you need on the test before you take it.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
What is the acceptable way to offer a trade of sex for a few hours of body heat?
I swear to god, if you ever yell my name during sex with my sister again..your balls will be stapled to your nipples.
Randomize