We're facebook friends in real life
you remind me of a slightly lless slutty bristol palin
and you remind me of a slightly less retarded levi johnston
FYI: if you have sex in your room with the light on, we can totally see your shadows from the parking lot
Your boyfriend has good rhythm though.
Why are you ignoring all of my texts?
The power was out.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i realized that the internet ruins the joy of a father passing down playboys to his son
I was an emotional waste case that night. She made me stroke her ponytail.
Gina was bawling her eyes out and then she ran into the street and peed. she kept screaming "LOOK WHAT YOUVE DONE TO ME"
I deserve a fucking award for best roommate. I just cleaned his room, so he can have a 3 some
I got a letter from the home owners association saying its against policy to have sex on the trampoline.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
I just found a piece of squished oatmeal cream pie in my armpit. So very sad.
He was super adorable, like I wanna pinch his cheeks while I fuck him...
Yea. You locked yourself outside naked with nothing but running shoes and claimed it was a "parent trap thing."
so I'm walking to my last final while opening my giant red bull and i look over to my right and the guy beside me had one too and was looking back at me. without missing a beat he pulls out a bottle of jager, pours half in mine, half in his and goes "cheers"....i'm not even mad i probably failed my final
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize