I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
i walked in and you were spoon feeding your sister grape juice out of a tupperware.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im sure shes a lovely person but i cant be friends with someone that doesnt drink. its just not right.
I pull out like 90% of the time, but that's just to make art.
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
it's finals week and we've been blasting country porch drinkin since 10AM. there's been like 4 tweets about hearin us on the other side of campus
One minute we were ordering sandwhiches. The next hes peeing in a trash can yelling at kids about how tv made him this way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Its mothers day... Can my present be an orgasm...for once?
if I was a good friend this would be the time that i would remind you that you have a boyfriend
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Im going for myspace 2006 goth bitch. Your worst nightmare
“On a break” is implied when it’s a Russian chick dressed as Black Widow wearing Minnie Mouse ears
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