You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
I didn't realize how hung over I was until I rolled over and the world rolled over with me.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
woke up this morning with a pool of champagne in my purse. apparently i was saving it for later.
It doesn't matter if he doesn't speak English because I speak the international language of blowies.
once I found out that a naked stripper wasn't gonna pop out of the cake I kind of just lost interest in the party
whatever. as long as im no longer referred to as the girl who fucked the pledge on his big brother's couch.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
My apartment smells like a lavender field inside of a giant bong.
I am currently in a U-Haul truck right now. Going to a party. I hate myself.
I made everyone scream the national anthem with me after playing true American last night. I'm pretty much their leader now.
So he came on my stomach this morning and I totally forgot about it until after you poured that body shot.
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
I am available for nakedness
Also, my guy said they would be around. And i clarified that when I asked him for mushrooms he didn't hear "a mushroom or two" but rather understood I meant "all the mushrooms you can find between now and 4th of July."
Randomize
