Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
i knew it was going to be a good night when i was bleeding, licked it and it tasted like miller light
This show inspires me to have sex in space
He had to stop fucking her halfway through to do a shit. When he returned she was still waiting for him. The joys of MDMA
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
Just watched my roommate stuff a sandwich in his pocket because we're out of paper plates.
So the bartender tried kicking me out but i screamed im an RA you cant kick me out
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
Just made a diving catch to save a handle of Fireball falling out of the car. ESPN worthy.
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
The lady at the liquor store in my hometown just gave ran around the corner and gave me a hug when I came back from being gone for a couple months. My life is complete.
are you the reason the first floor girls' bathroom smells like weed?
The people above me are fucking to Miley Cyrus
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