So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
so the chest pain/shortness of breath/overdose guy we just took to tm hospital is now running down market street from the police in a gown holding his iv.
went to the gyno and found out that i have a birthmark on my clit. its like god gave guys a little help when it comes to getting me off.
I HAVE A PRESENT FOR YOU AND ITS NOT MY VAGINA
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She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
So hungover. I'm getting too old for trolloping around in disco shorts going shot for shot with well behaved underclassmen in an effort to lure them to the dark side of alcoholism and liver failure.
Some guy just ate one of the dog treats. I have him a free beer. I love my job.
It would seem she's painting a bullseye right in between her legs
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
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So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
You know the sex was good when he had to ask which way was north before he left.
Tip: never mention Guy Fieri during sex
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Im sorry you'll never get the feeling of closeness when you go to pee outside and you realize you're peeing right where someone else just peed
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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