Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
There was a bottle of vodka and chips in a vase next to the bed
Last thing I remember is beer bonging sangria. Dear God.
They're making him take his shirt off cause they think he's the bouncer. We're in his backyard.
Hey man, I found your crocs and your visor in the road. Got em for you.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I just took the soggiest of beer shits and all i have to eat is shredded cheese and more beer. I need an adult.
you're the third guy in less than 24 hours she fucked. I'm glad you lost your virginity just don't act like you climbed Mt. Everest.
It's the never-ending clusterfuck that is my love life
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
