Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I was so high last night that i'm 89% sure my roommates set up an obstacle course for me and timed it. Not positive.. I think one of the challenges was pairing shoes
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
i told you that I felt like my feet were melting into the ground and you starting blowing on them to put out the "invisible fire". thanks friend.
The cop asked you if you had been drinking and you said you drank milk out of a cow.
I rememeber. I showed him the picture on my phone of me drinking out of the utter, right?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I spent most of the night trying to drink out of three bottles of beer at once. I don't have to be told the reasons I'm single
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Went on a blind date. Afterwards I ripped my pants off and said "it's game time". He was into it.
ayo
its like you know when i get waxed
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
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