her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Street performer on bourbon st just lifted a sewer top so I could puke down it. I love New Orleans.
I didnt realize til after I got out of her apartment and into the lobby that we lived in the same building.
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
The token old dude at the show tried hitting on us by telling us his favorite rapper was Cayenne West.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Uh oh we had sex and I don't think I like him anymore help
it was all good until mid make out when he announced 'i just came'. ...he wasn't joking.
That has got to be a joke. No human eats that much grass and lives to tell the tale.
Randomize
