I just bought Christian paraphenilia at Borders for my dad's bday. I had the urge to tell them it wasn't mine, like I was buying laxatives or a dildo
Hahahaha. You probably would have been more comfortable buying either of those than what you just bought
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
he told me that if i wanted to smoke he could make a piece out of my shoe. were keeking this kid around
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
honestly, i'm just crying in the kitchen naked and eating salsa
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
Just chugged a Bloody Mary in 60 seconds flat. New personal best! Happy Sunday!
I would say I miss her friendship, then I remember that she gave 4 guys the clap. I'm good.
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
He ate a Doritos taco from my boobs. Does your boyfriend do that?
PLEASE AT LEAST MEOW SO I KNOW YOU AREN'T DEAD
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