Nakedness is not a toga. Just sayin
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
If it makes you feel better, I doubt anything could survive in your uterus.
sweet and enthusiastic is code for tiny dick.
She walked in, looked at the bed, sniffed, sighed, and went to grab her cleaning supplies. I'd say she knows.
I dunno... But she calls vodka "dancing juice"
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
I showed up to a booty-call in my onesie pajamas and rubber boots
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I guess I can give it a shot. I usually just get belligerently drunk and go where my penis and feet lead me. No fights or getting too lost, so they seem to be doing a good job
I just want to smoke this blunt and eat pizza rolls while watching The Price Is Right with you.
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
She's blowing me while I'm watching air jaws. I love shark week.
Randomize
