Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
I'm at a free clinic. Feel like I should cough or sneeze so it's not blatantly obvious I'm getting checked for STI's.
I'm sorry. I think I have multiple personalities. Or it was the acid. Either way. I'm sorry.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Dude. You gotta go home. I think I left the snake hanging on the chandelier.
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Not every day do you see a hooker getting arrested at noon. Just kidding, we live in Reno.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
I'm dipping store brand pepperoni pizza in bacon flavored ranch dressing. Obesity tastes so good.
It's like everything I need in life within a five block radius: booze, toilets, dogs, dicks.
There is no issue with you seeing me...morally or ethically. we'll update your resume anyway. I really need to have sex with you later. Really
You gotta do what you gotta do. Like how I gotta drive in the rain to go get chicken nuggets. I just gotta.
Because of you I can never eat chicken nuggets without thinking of you fucking him. I hope youre happy. I really do.
u ever get horny for food. i ordered a bunch of crepes and its doin it 4 me
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