so he went down on me and i thought i heard him say "you're smelly" to my vagina
i got awkward and finally asked him what he said
he actually said "you want some dick?" to my vagina. which is worse? either way he's talking to it
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
Yea. You cant just squeeze my balls. They are sensitive
Bank of America: Available balance is $546.25 on 03/04/2011 for account 8428. Go online for details. TextSTOPtoStop/TextHELPforHelp
i loe djcudia fjxos rue.
Smuggling a beer bottle full of vodka out of the bar with a tampon as a plug for the top of the bottle wasn't one of my classiest ideas... but your hangover proves it was resourceful and effective. Your welcome.
The sense of comroderie I've built with my liver over the course of this semester is beautiful
He woke me up at 5am to recite nursery rhymes to our fictitious unborn child.
Also, thank you for letting me cry in your lap on the bathroom floor. I can't remember if I was clothed at that point, but if I wasn't, extra thank you.
You jumped into so many bushes for no reason
I snuck out three pillows from the hotel i was rolling so hard. They are like little clouds. I regret nothing.
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
I yelled at him as he left "you broke up with me. You lost your blow job privileges"
Why did I wake up with a half-eaten burrito and a vaccuum cleaner in my bed? ...on top of me.
Wow first he impregnates you then he won't send you the sex tape you made together? Where has chivalry gone?
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