i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
I feel that my census will not be the first census submitted soaked in beer
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
Your CAR. Is in a LAKE. I'd say "a big mess" is a pretty conservative description of the situation.
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
If by "Are you drunk?" you mean "Did you just faceplant in the checkout line at Target?" the answer is yes.
We're taking a shot every time Landon Donovan takes a shot. It's clever, sort of.
He went snooping and now he's all intimidated by my super amazing box of sexy time toys.
Please stop calling it that.
The highlight was when a stranger was nose to nose with you threatening to kick ur ass, and you said "Is that your real face? Stopped him dead.
Do you want me to add this to the list of actions I will state at your intervention
You haven't lived until you have fucked while Fantasia is on
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
Well the cops were called after the kid fell, but we saw 4 cute guys from our window while it was going down, so it wasn't all that bad.
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