honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
who knew getting puke in ur hair could make it look so cute and curly. minus the crusty puke part
i just rolled a joint on the giving tree. that book has given me so much.
we talked for like an hour, i feel like we really bonded. i mean i was simultaneously giving him head but you get the point.
Send me the video of myself under the polar bear skin. It's important.
Whiskey and an unstable home life is apparently the fountain that 20-something boys like to drink from.
I may have just made our entire microwave glow green. Like big green. Like spark and make me shit green.
Like worse than the time I blew up the microwave with the egg green.
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
It was really strange. I feel like I had sex with a synchronized swimmer.
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
I wish u could call a dildo. Like you do a missing cell phone.
Still riding the magical train of drugs so, yeah, Id say I feel great
I'm having to shit out rocks
The dogs decided to play a new game called "Who Can Scream the Loudest?"
I won.
Randomize
