He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
i think i am going to devote my summer to making my cats internet celebrities
My sheets, bed, and bathroom are covered in blood. She needed 14 stitches after a trip to ER. This is the last white girl I ever hookup with.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
The one wearing a viking helmet and holding a bottle of Smirnoff. She's laying on the floor of the tube singing "cant find my way home" . You can't miss her..
I feel like I have to sign a death waver before I have sex with him...
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Found a popcorn kernel in my pubes... Time fir a Brazilian
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like they've probably fucked. Like.. you don't just bring a bitch a Big Mac if you haven't fucked her.
You're about wine.
Yes, I'm like 90% wine at the moment
He came on my favorite pants. He is dead to me.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
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