How can something that makes you feel so good one day make you feel so bad the next?
Alcohol?
Sex with a fat chick.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
If the first sentence isn't something about weed or the nature of choclate I'm skipping class.
They have beer in plastic boots. How am I supposed to resist that?
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Medically YOU CAN'T BE AN ALCOHOLIC TILL 25!!!!! WE GET 3 BONUS YEARS!!!!
After some trial and error I found soaking my balls in maple syurip helps ease the pain.
So glad I decided to show up and puke in your trashcan.
These are the moments that bond souls forever.
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I just got winded making my bed. How do you think the workout plan is going?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
Ah, Christ. I just saw a D lister I made out with once on a Rock Of Love rerun. Why are you asleep right now? Some weird shit is happening.
Can't. I'm doing shots with my mom.
Randomize
