my boss just made his own remix to aaron carter's i want candy. i cant decide if its the funniest or most embarrassing thing ive seen
Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
he asked me if i wanted "a hit" off his inhaler. its definitely time for a new roommate
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
Holy shit. Do you realize what this means? Officially all of my ex-bfs are either dead or gay
His "hunger Strike for change" lasted 4 days. Hi welcome to my coke binge last weekend....not impressed
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
I have their Unicorn picture in my shirt, and I just threw a Bud Light Platinum bottle through their window. We need to go now.
I shit myself. Legit. And I burnt my tongue. Unrelated incidents, but related in the sense of general discomfort.
We're having Wednesday-night goat-night at the bar.
It's hard to explain...
Eh maybe I should give her a chance. Let's see where making a porno takes the friendship
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
You gave my cousin a blowjob and are facebook friends with my mom. Is there a name for this level of friendship?
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
