I'm dying. Please wear something slutty to my funeral.
she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
i threw up on the blunt... he was pissed.
he woke me up at 3 am to ask me where my plunger, a towel, and staples were. i'm afraid to go into my bathroom.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
My phone really needs to stop auto correcting "library" to "ovary".
its not a holiday until ive ruined the family picture because im drunk
My mom and I are having a "yay I don't have herpes" shopping trip day
Three people drank on "never have I had sex in a tractor." Iowa at its best?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I ended up at these random girls' house they are smoking weed out of a gun
It's a pretty amazing thing to watch... He used "Rad tits" as his pick up line of the night. And it worked... 3 times
This is the worst drive ever. Im hungry, hungover, i gotta shit so bad, and the only radio station im getting clearly is playing alvin and the chipmunks christmas songs
It's my birthday. I should be drinking mimosas in a top hat, not working.
Just opened my sisters laptop to "cute places to lose my virginity" googled last
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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