We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
So she is eating her margarita with tortilla chips....like using her chip as a spoon
I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
He soundtracked our prebreakup sex, our breakup, and out postbreakup sex. At least he's dedicated.
every time you want to hook up with a guy who has a girl friend, i'll just give you a freshman
it never fails, everytime he manages to fuck my earrings out of my ears.
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
Well since its impossible for me to swallow a pill this big I'm making wine slushies out of them
We have six bottles of wine and we are at target buying baby oil to grease up the sleds with, just in case you're interested.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
These beer shits have taken over my entire life.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
You started yelling about vegans ruining the world. Because we drove past some cows eating grass.
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