your ex dropped by. you can call me dwight howard, cuz im the king of rebounds
just smoked a bowl with my history teacher. i love community college
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
For future reference, the words 'big' and 'problem' should be used sparingly with a person whom you have recently had copious amounts of unprotected sex
if I die on the way please explain to my mother that I do not wear fishnets on a regular basis
Im wearing all my glow sticks to bed so i know where my arms are at all times.
she's traveling up the coast with her camera and a stash of pot cookies eating food from different campuses. said she slept in a closet 2 states away last nite... of course I'm interested
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
Last night you found an onion ring in your fries and then you started singing "A Moment like this"
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
i now regret my decision on turning down your offer of sex in the backseat
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Dick is dick. I’m not turning it down because he’s younger than me. Covid has been a real cockblock and I’m a woman with needs
Randomize
