it doesn't mae me god, the fact that I am god makes getting dressed futile and tedious... btw i am still drunk
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I mean, once you get beat with a dildo you can't look at someone the same
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I am seriously thinking about wearing a blanket as a cape. So when I pass out tonight the blanket might keep me warm.
you know that feeling on acid where you think the world stops just to fuck with you? That's what it felt like.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
He shattered his pelvis base jumping so his dicks out of commission for 4 months. Your up, second string.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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