do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
its not stalking. its research.
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
I just puked on my dog.I feel summer coming on
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
If anyone from work finds out about us I will rip your dick off, sew it to your forehead and feed your balls to you like little grapes
Since you're going to wake up and see one bajillion missed calls from me, I just want you to know that's a perfectly reasonable number. Now come downystairs.
In other news: I found out that my mom used to fuck my newest fuck buddy's dad when they were in school.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
It's def pee. WHY DO I PEE ON THINGS WHEN I DRINK TEQUILA
I just swallowed confetti and motor-boated some guys beard...#happy2015
We should get drunk in walmart
when?
20 minutes ago
Panties = found
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