i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
Just got laid for the first time in 3 yrs, 10 mo, 1 wk & 2 days. YESSSS.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
My Grampa even called her out for being a cock block at the bar...it was that serious
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
You were force feeding yourself jello and you kept repeating, "I will not surrender"
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
Totally just drove past you riding your bike. I was like damn, that looks like a cute little hipster boy, and then I realized it was you and that I'd already banged you and it kinda made my day. I hope you're well. Come over soon?
Much like Dre, I was forgotten about.
U touched your head and and said "oh look blood" and then looked at me and touched my face... And said war paint
I would date him. For 1 month. Just so I could say I was a trap queen for 1 month.
I told him it was fine and then I keyed his car.
Randomize
