sometimes i think life is slapping me across the face and laughing, saying "ha ha! you're an adult!"
I cant believe Lindsay Lohan feels like this every day
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
It feels like I'm breathing out my heart and it spreads through my limbs to my fingertips.
I'm having an emotional breakdown watching baby sloths on YouTube you need to come save me from myself.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I just said give me penis or give me death. Some patriot is rolling around in his grave right now.
well when I said that I would ride his face until he ran out of oxygen, that's when I knew I shouldn't be around beautiful people anymore.
I slid a quarter down a drunk man's butt crack last night. Qdoba gets rowdy
Well I may have gotten laid but I over drafted buying pizza so I think that negates everything
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
My dad called me in the middle of the night, drunk on vodka, asking for references on the Irish alphabet.
Honestly, I am sitting in my room watching Ciara videos and thinking I am super jealous of how she rides it.
Let's just face it you're going to have an arrangement with your future wife your fuck me on Thursdays
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