Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
He must hate going to the bathroom. Every time he does he is reminded how small his dick is.
Its like I was sleeping with a kid. His gum fell into my hair while sleeping and he just wanted to cuddle.
you tried to pee on a squirrel and everyone saw. you've got some serious untagging to do
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
I feel like now would be a good time to apologize for vomiting in your eye
christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I just want to have such an intense orgasm that my heart stops and I die. I mean that would kind of suck for the guy I'm fucking but then again he could be like "I'm that good"
So it's official the pockets of my work apron exist solely for the purpose of secretly flipping off asshole customers and not losing my job.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
Yo i still have 5 hrs left of work. I should not be this drunk
Randomize
