He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
the welcome home hickey he left on my boob is really gunna put a damper on the rest of my thanksgiving hook up plans with the rest of my ex's
I'm currently braless eating the balls of the penis cake and drinking warm champagne. I'm 3 cats away from crazy at this point
You kept whispering "Party Dave" every time someone would start talking.
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
that's the first time I've heard "shenanigans" and "apocalypse" in the same sentence
My sobriety has gotten out of control. I think I need an intervention.
Her vagina is like the upper echelon of Scientology and I don't have enough money to get in
He said a lot of nice things about me, it was really uncalled for.
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
did i tell you guys i finally 69’d for the first time last night? just thought the group chat should know.
I’ve chosen to watch a Mercedes station wagon drive around the Austrian in the rain because it’s live sports. If that doesn’t explain 2020, I don’t know what does.
Randomize
