No. You are not the Kate in this relationship. I will do what I want.
i'm having a wet tshirt contest with myself and yet i'm still losing
do you ever just like the smell of your farts?
I woke up with a Nike swoosh shaved into my chest hair. my friend got 3 stitches. my phone had a text that simply read "fuck you". I say it was a good party.
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
the whole story woulnd't be so depressing if i had made out with ANYONE but the piano player.
I dont know but I had two different hospital bands and half a pie when i woke up.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
Just sitting in the tub googling "how to remove sharpie from skin". You?
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
so he found out i have him as "average size" in my phone. fair to say we arnt going to be dating anymore
Randomize
