I'm gonna start referring to my vag as my ladygarden
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
Nope, just sitting on the couch, eating an advent calendar, being depressed about the herps.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
Travelers Top-Tip: Europeans do not appreciate being repeatedly referred to as "gypsy" regardless of how good your Borat impression is.
We sat on the porch laughing about hilarious the sunrise was. And that we can do drugs again in the morning, thank god
Is it bad that I don't ask for names anymore? Just added "gold-chain-wearing hotel guy" to my list under "minivan 3way" and "funny-tasting gym guy."
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Everything I own smells like cigarettes and victory right now. The smell is never coming out.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
If you get any calls give me a heads up. Im drinking rum in my underwear on the back porch.
Has anyone heard from Jamie or has she actually just been having sex for 48 hours?
I came so hard I literally levitated off the top of his dick. Gravity was no match for that orgasm!
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
Im sorry for telling you id rather jump into traffic than date you again. I didnt mean to be so rude
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