so we started it doggy style, but since we were really drunk kinda fell to the side and turned into a 'lazy dog'... my new favorite position btw
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
Old lady caught me peeing in the street and yelled at me and said "I REBUKE YOU"
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
I smoked out of two pipes at the same time while my friends wielded the lighters last night. It felt like I graduated to the next level of stoner.
My ex came over to hook up...then I went on a date 2 hours later and got a bj. Single: Finally doing it right.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
Speaking of, what are you doing next weekend? I'm going to a rope bondage seminar and may need a partner if my date bails.
Stay away a while longer.
Still not sure if they're cops or strippers.
Googled 'how drunk am I' and it was NOT helpful
Can I make sure all my sluttiness goes to you when I die? You're the only person I know who'll make use of it
Randomize
