For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
Chalk up having sex in a car wash.
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
On the plus side this hangover is the tipping point that finally convinced my lazy ass to get some sunglasses.
I vaguely remember making out with his tattoo (?) and giving him an awesome massage and then I passed out on his floor. Shrug
of course we have a beer bong
how else would we feed our christmas tree
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
If you already knew specifically that I was smoking a bowl in my remodeled bathroom AND THEN still wanted to initiate sexting, please proceed to the altar and marry me this instant.
I thought the Bane mask would really repel dudes but instead I ended up grinding on a frat dude that whispered "bad bitch contest, you in first place" in my ear in a Batman voice
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
When he was going down on me I referred to him as "Lord Snow" and HE GOT IT. HE GOT THE GAME OF THRONES REFERENCE. I AM IN LOVE
We have angered the beer gods. It feels like I'm shitting angry cats.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
how do do this?
do what? Keep standing? Choose between 2 guys?
keep making boys cry?
Randomize
