Anal astronaut?
Wow word travels fast.
why cant girls ever use the fly? why do they always have to awkwardly try to pull it over your belt?
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
im using the astroglide sample u sent me as a bookmark for the book im using to write my midterm paper. i need to get laid. bad.
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
I don't think the cop knew you were on ecstasy until you asked for a back rub.
Its going to be drunk as shit/pirate themed. Im dressing as the former.
Sorry for screaming that you were an apple in spanish at the bar last night, that was the wine talking
She insisted we fuck to Ludacris, not how I imagined popping her lesbian cherry would be. I tried delt and I liked it.
You're cock blocking me from my own boyfriend. What kind of shit is that?
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I'm glad I can share my workout progress with you via my nudes
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
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