remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
That's like rubbing a penis in my face and not giving it to me.
I'm gonna make this happen. You think it would be too forward to text him my room number with turn by turn directions straight to my crotch?
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
It's blow job season.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
When you're really drunk, Japanese toilets just have an unnecessary amount of buttons.
He asked if I was going to squirt out my bday candles. I'm glad the perversion doesn't stop for special occasions.
I was giving this fat lawyer a table dance and he asked me if I would be willing to play with his long, hard stick of the law. And you want me to stop drinking at work?
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