Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
So the girl I hooked up with last night pretended to be from Comcast when my girlfriend stopped by this morning. She even made a fake appointment to check her internet. Best hookup ever.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
He said female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one.
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
If you think I'm going to drive 5.5 hours just to bang a guy, you'd be absolutely right.
Randomize
