I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
Omg i either met the gayest dude ever or my next boyfriend
Oddly enough when I decided to stop whoreing myself out... I lost most of my companionship.
searching my car for your cum before I have to give my grandma a ride to the airport. Thanks for this
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
He burnt a smiley face into the screen with a cigarette, peed in my tub and then tried to take off his pants. tried...
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
Masturbating on the clock at work is my specialty.
I'm sensing a Yuletide blow job in your future and by future I mean tomorrow
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
You kept singing "your gonna lose that girl" to him right in front of her.. of course you got punched in the face.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
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