Dude, I found another chunk missing out of my tooth. Fuck drinking on tuesdays.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
They let me out of the holding cell just in time for me to get the morning-after-pill. Rock bottom feels even worse with all those hormones.
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
I took Xanax and it did nothing to me. First sign I'm crazy and actually need it.
Shit. I'm suppose to call the bank but I'm too high to talk numbers.
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
We're not piercing ourselves today.
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
We both shit in the same closet in Santa Fe. Nothing is sacred anymore.
so apparently over the course of the night my roommate and i had sex in exactly the same spot. ps the downstairs sink needs cleaning.
Randomize
