I would wrestle an alligator for a bj right now
one might say we're banned from that church
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
this girl walked outta his room as i was walkin in to scottys and i just say " time for the walk of shame baby! whoooo!". she ran away
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I decided to follow my clitoris instead of my heart.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Everyone is coupling up and I'm just excited the bartender gives me enough attention to order more shots.
Hey I can officially say I made out with a drug lord.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
Randomize