apparently they started giving me water shots and i couldnt tell the difference
dude, i was at the student union last night trying to study but some retarded sorority spent an hour voting on the color of the seasons shirts like it was a UN meeting- someone motioned purple, someone objected, and half an hour later after 2 recounts they decided on purple
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
Knitting and drinking wine. Forget my 21st birthday, might as well just skip to my 60th
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Do u have any idea how hard it is to masturbate in a CVS bathroom when your name is being called over the speakers to pick up a prescription for painkillers?
Your phone just changed "liver" to "liquor" how dose that make you feel
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
Dude. All I know is that I woke up on the floor with two naked chicks who don't speak English.
Clutch
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
easy for you to say. you're not the one who has to explain why you woke up with a pineapple and a used condom.
In honor of Randy Savage we're wearing spandex and handing out slim jim's with option to suplex. Get behind it
Randomize
