Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
Talk about the highs and lows of a night out: had a threesome, then got robbed at knifepoint.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he broke off your car antennae to use as a walking stick before he smoked because he claimed to lack the facial strength needed to open his eyes when he's high
You work today? I woke up with a raging boner that was whispering your name
I feel like drug tests are a little less "random" when you are employed by your father.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me"I think your ready for this" and went into his closet whipped out a movie certiffied light saber.
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
No I got a fucking mosquito bite on my vagina. Summer is off to a bumpy start.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize