I hope to God it wasnt poon. That odor was unnatural, it was satanic pussy.
Just caught my bro jerking off to a lane Bryant catalog
I am like the Mr. Miyagi of queefs.
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
I just had a flashback of 4:30am: me hugging the toilet bowl and you handing me a jar of pickles to open. There is something seriously wrong with us.
Even my vagina gasped.
In fairness it was pretty good sex, but I still wasn't expecting the mass cheering and applause he got on leaving my tent
HE THREATENED ME WITH A CACTUS. WHERE DID HE EVEN GET A CACTUS.
Lights are FLASHING. This just got REAL. CAPTALIZATION.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Why did I wake up to grapes taped my ears ?
Sorry dude, we didn't want you to hear us. Seemed like a good idea at the time.
I just had a horrible epiphany. I have fucked girls younger than Star Tours
This text was so worth waking up to
Hey. Im sorry to bother you but I just watched the seinfield episode about faking an orgasm and it caused me to second guess myself. Were you satisfied?
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.
Randomize
