You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
Today I learned you can't titshake with a corset on.
She came in to my room half naked at 3am asking me if I had seen the movie balls deep 7
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
I woke up to his gay cousin telling me I had the prettiest boobs. I don't even wanna know.
i can feel the knowledge leaking out of my brain
replace it with alcohol - nature abhors a vacuum
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
if you want to know how my night is going I just ugly cried in the cheesecake factory
Explain to me again why I'm doing the walk of shame if we fucked at my house?
If waffles and beer don't scream "fuck me!" then I don't know what else to do.
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I don't think getting eaten out in a smart car behind a circle-k on my break by a guy I just met classifies as social distancing, but I'm beginning to love night shift more and more.
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