When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
I mean i might have to drop this class tomorrow. I just walked into a midterm
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
bad: friday night i tripped and fell outside my dorm. worse: i just found out i broke my ankle. worst: i was shitfaced and don't remember any of this.
Id love to say been there done that but im a slutty drunk not a stupid one.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
did i mention he attempted to milk her in backseat?
The only thing in that hotel room that we didn't fuck on was the roof
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
I'm pretty sure I got a cavity today due to how many times I've puked hungover at work.
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I just love that a strip club has taco Tuesday.
I am afraid of asking him for his new number so I continue to text the one that's no longer in service.
I woke up next to him with nothing on and my thong around his neck. I just put my clothes on and left, but he still has my thong.
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