Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
My mom just got knocked over by a rollerblader. I'm trying not to laugh, bc my family looks pretty concerned
No, I don't think Michelle is a squirter. And if I've had anal sex, the Obamas have.
I can't believe you made out with me with a french fry in your mouth.
and then some norwegians asked us to be in their porno.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
I shouldn't have that kind of responsibility when the prospect of being high is readily available. All I could do was hula hoop and smoke cigarettes last night. My remembrance of anything important was out the window.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
