Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
my step dad just called me a drunken slut..someone in my family finally understands me
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
check off brunette on the list of girls tht hit me with there cars and then fucked me later
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He chipped a tooth on the first beer. You know the night is just going to be a slushy mess after that.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
I was busy. But now I'm about to consume alcohol and chicken. We shall see where this takes us. Maybe to the moon, maybe to the floor. I have no idea.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
Some guy I'd never met and didn't invite threw the punch bowl at the wall and set the plastic skeleton on fire. I don't think we'll be getting the full deposit back
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now Heβs Upset Because People Told His Mom
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
This Asian instant coffee I found in ur kitchen is like crack. Who knew I could feel my heart beating in my asshole after one cup of this happiness.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
Can I bother you for a second.
You always bother me but go on.
I was supposed to see Marcus tonight and he cancelled. Listen, I shaved my butt hole. Somebody is getting this WAP ππππ
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