hipster in red sally jessy raphael glasses inside. kick her.
Skipping work because i'm still too drunk from last night still. got home at midnight and passed out in front of my door for 2 hours bc i couldn't find my key
had to call my rooommate to let us in. Passed out in my dress and found the key on my hair tie-in my hair- just now.
I should have bought two bottles, she left before I could feel her tits...
we put on a show in the hot tub for our boyfriends, then climbed out and both got down on our hands and knees and puked at the same time--still naked.
25 People Confess The Most Awkward Situation They’ve Ever Been In
so i wake up and the chick who i had sex last night left her phone number. next to the number was a broken condom. should i call?
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
The amount of 12yr olds downtown right now boggles the mind. I can thank taylor swift for a glimpse at my future 3rd wife.
he proposed by singing a showtune... he might as well have had a cock in his mouth at the time
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
These Are 21 Of The Most Delusional People Ever
Sorry you had to see that, but on the bright side...at least I trust you enough to have sex in front of you
I told him i wanted to be exclusively cheating with him
First I must say that I am disappointed to learn that you knowingly have trashy friends with whom you've not hooked me up.
I was out with the drag queens until 7am. This is the hangover I needed to kick my ass back to sobriety. Dear Virgin Mary, fuck my life.
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?